Ho. Ho. Hammacher Schlemmer. Ho.

You can’t say it without smiling, and you can’t say it properly after a few Friday afternoon cocktails. (I know, but it’s Friday afternoon somewhere, and besides it sounded much better than Thursday morning tequila shots.)

Scanning through this classic Christmas catalog that claims:
Offering the Best, the Only and the Unexpected for 160 years

I found lots of potential gifts for my friends and family from a fish finding watch, a hands free video camera, a voice controlled ipod controller and a perfect martini maker to this bug vacuum.
If we still had little ones to buy for I would definitely be clicking on this. I mean, remote controlled? The possibilities are endless.
My husband has marked his pages and the kids circled theirs and I am left wondering why no one put my initials on this or this.
I’m thinking the husband, whose birthday is December 24th, might get a kick out of receiving THIS.
Wow…the description alone… which makes me think, Hey Hammacher Schlemmer, you should hire some new copywriters. This ad copy is boring, you need some writers from the Onion or T-Shirt Hell to spice things up, I mean if you can sell a solar powered golf cart for nine grand and this 2 person 3 wheeled scooter coupe for seven grand, I’d think you could pay a more talented writing staff.

PS. If you’re looking? I know one who’s available.